Ooops, I did it again . . .

Oops. I know, I know, I’m late. But I’ve been sick! Unable to type a word, let alone actually be semi-clever about it. And I couldn’t have predicted a different ending to the one that happened. The three singers I chose to go through in my Official Aus Idol Tipping Comp are the three who did – Lee, Natalie and DreadyDan. (If I’d set my tipping up in time – damnit – I would have been 8 for 9. As it is, Eupholoofo is leading the comp and FYI for those who haven’t met her in real life, she’s about the cutest thing ever.) But none the less . . . here ‘tis in all its glory (if I don't get too distracted by the cute boys of Fox8's Manhunt and lose my train of thought . . . )

Nat. Nat, Nat, Nat, Nat. Man, I hate that song. Light My Fire makes me hurl. (Ooh, maybe that’s why I’ve been unwell?? Shut up Jim Morrison.) I don’t care who is singing it. And then the arrangement? Gah. Double gah. I wanted to like her soooo much. I didn’t. She absolutely looked like a drag queen (not the last of the evening) and the saddest thing is she has a fabulous voice, but song choice sank her goooooood. No surpise she wasn’t top four and didn’t get a Wildcard.

Jeremy. Dude could not have looked more nervous. Before he went out to sing, Jeremy was sitting next to Mathieson on the couch and he was blinking frantically, a sure sign of stress and anxiety. No surprise that he then tanked with his song. Second worst performance on AI this season (after the hideous Laura. Fuck. How did she get through?? HOW??!!). He was flat and off key. He doesn’t have any charisma, none, nada, zip. I did a little dance of concern when they were handing out the Wildcards but I’m so glad Mark waved him buh-bye. Later, dude.

Lauren. Best. Shoes. Ever. So-so dress. CRAPPY song. Lauren’s performance reminded me why some people dismiss AI as nothing more than a mere national karaoke competition. (I usually point those people in the direction of ANY of Chanel’s performances and then dare them to call her karaoke, I'm such a fangirl!!) Watching Lauren’s performance was like watching one of those shows where taxi drivers from Manchester dress up like Elvis and sing Heartbreak Hotel. It was total impersonation – which is what Kyle then told her, causing me to scream at the tv for him to get out of my head. Seriously, starting to freak me out. Glad she got the Wildcard because she has a good voice. She rocked the glory note but she should sing Lauren. Not that she’ll get through Wildcard either.

Leah. Going to the adbreak before her performance, Andrew G called her the ‘magnificent Leah’. Yeah. Can someone give G a dictionary and a thesaurus and also a WordADay calendar? Thanks. Leah’s range is just too limited. All I could think was that she was going to struggle horribly with some of the categories they get them to sing if she made it through. Thank goodness she didn’t. Another nice glory note but the rest was out of tune and pitchy.

Joe. Haircut. Joe, please I’m begging you. Alternatively, put the beanie back on. Hair like that just begs to be made fun of, you big girl. Joe’s singing was blah. It wasn’t great, it wasn’t bad. It just . . . was.

Natalie. This girl has a bad case of The Mariah Complex. At least she didn’t trill the fuck out of too many notes. She started shaky but picked up fairly quickly and didn’t suck. Going into it I thought she would have to be really really bad not to make it through because she has the kind of voice that FM radio stations dig. She’s this seasons Ricki-Lee. Mean of Holden to give her the faux-touchdown, but I think he’s still pissed about the Laura thing (whyohwhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhyy?) and is taking it out on everyone. I’m a little okay with that.

Lee. Squeee! Is it wrong that I find him strangely attractive. Yes, even with that hair. He’s infectious, he has a gleam in his eye that I find compelling, sexy, hottttttt . . . sorry, I lost myself there for a bit. His song choice was great. Although it didn’t really showcase his voice, it did give us a sense of identity which is important at this stage – people want someone they like, to vote for. Boyfriend isn’t just a pretty, multipierced face, y’all (and watch G with him next time he’s on because G totally has himself a little same sex crush).

DreadyDan. Another song I just hate – the Commitments soundtrack has a lot to answer for, they totally ruined this song for me. I can’t listen to anyone sing it. Neil Finn could serenade me with it from below the balcony on which I would be reclining on a lounge chair with a Long Island Iced Tea in one hand as Tim from BB peeled and fed me grapes, and it could be the most beautifully sung masterpiece and Tim could be slowly undressing me with his eyes and I would rather hear Achy Breaky Heart and take a nap. I shit you not. Hate this song. Dan made me hate it slightly less. Nice use of the vocal cords oh dreaded one, I look forward to seeing what you do in the Top Twelve.

Emily. Ladies and gentlemen, our second drag queen of the night. This song did nuttin’ for me. It was choppy and made her voice sound a lot weaker than it is. She deserved the Wildcard, she can do much better than that. Although if she did make it through to Top Twelve, she’d be in direct competition with the diva we already have, Anne. With Anne and now Natalie, I don’t think there’s any more room left, we are chockful of Diva's. We have a Diva Overload. Heeee.

James. Gaaaaah, enough of the Callea freaking wannabes already! None of them have been anywhere near as good as the pint sized one and James is another example, although I think nerves got the better of James too. FINALLY! – Kyle and I disagreed on something tonight, because no Kyle, James could not win this thing. I wouldn’t have given him a Wildcard, but then I wouldn’t give him the time of day either (badoom chink - thankyou thankyou, I'm here all week, please remember to tip your waitress, try the fish).

So, yay for Lee and Dan, no surprise with Natalie and bring on the Wildcard show and Roxanne actually getting through . . .