Monday, August 24, 2009

Idle

Then.

September 17th, 2006;

"Jessica Mauboy continues to show us how unbearably cute she is and what an awesome set of pipes she has by laying out Kelly Clarkson’s ‘Walk Away’, a move that initially had my head in my hands because that is a hard song to sing, but Jessica nails it to the freaking wall. When she hits the big KC note in the middle she gets a ridiculously pleased look on her face, she’s Cheshire Cat happy and tremendously hard not to like. It’s an extremely joyous performance and (along with Klancie and Chris) Jessica is having the fucking time of her life up on that stage. Kyle discards any and all brownie points he may have earned with me by saying that although he loved her singing and the performance that he doesn’t want to “see the jelly belly in the white singlet” again. There is a millisecond of quiet from an audience that can’t believe what the FUCK they just heard, before they go batshit crazy, screaming out how beautiful she is and James and G practically leap off the stage and gut Kyle where he sits, spitting at him that she’s only sixteen (she is, in fact, seventeen but that is SO very beside the point) and G tells Kyle “you can talk chubscout”. I fucking heart both of them and think Kyle should check his brakes before he drives anywhere. I sincerely hope she is able to forget he said that and that Jessica didn’t go to sleep last night with that fuckwit’s words replaying over and over in her head because that way lies an eating disorder and she is quite frankly adorable. But you can see on her face that she’s gone from the amazing high of her performance to the incredible low of wondering how fat she looks on tv and vowing not to eat for the next week. I loathe Kyle more than I’ve ever loathed him before. Congratulations asshole, you’re back on my shit list."

Now.

I'd like to formally thank the sponsers who turned their concerned and furrowed brows in Channel Ten's direction. I don't miss you Kyle Sandilands (but oh, OH, Mr James Mathieson. Please please come back. G looks so damn sad. Breakups are hard on EVERYONE, man. And John Foreman? What could you possibly be doing that is more important than Idol, oh squeaky one?) I know I said I'd blog the semi's, but that first episode was blander than the sago my Grandfather used to eat on the Pritikin Diet. All boring. Also, I have rehearsals this week and it's been almost a year since the VCRs in our house have been used and they're acting up. But I get Foxtel IQ on Thursday - exciting, yes?! Yes!

So next Sunday. Top 12. See you there.

TallulahBelle out

1 comment:

Kyriake said...

Woohoo! I was waiting to see when you'd start up your idol posts... they are the only thing that make idol season bearable these days! :)